Hospital Jitters

Well today's the big day. I am sitting in my hospital room blogging. The best part of having a baby in this day and age are the many technological devices available for you to entertain yourself. For example, obviously I am on a computer. We also have an ipod port if we choose to play our favorite tunes. There is a dvd player and tv which we are watching "The Incredibles" on. (We love Disney movies!) I feel very fortunate. Our (me and Colby's) mom's had to sit and watch the clock for hours with little to distract them from their anxiety or their contractions.

But let's back up a little bit. On Tuesday night me and Colby drove in to Tulsa from our home in McAlester because I preferred to be in Tulsa to deliver our baby. (There are quite a few shady stories circulating about the hospital in McAlester.) On the drive to Tulsa as we were talking I told Colby something that had just occurred to me: I've never had to be admitted to a hospital before. Never laid in a hospital bed, never had an iv, etc. And in one day, I will be experiencing all that and more. It was then that I started to feel a little anxiety for the first time in 9 months. On Wednesday this anxiety grew most of the day and peaked last night as reality set in. It was so strange to think that in the morning I would be heading to the hospital to have a baby, that I would be adding the title of "mother" to sister, daughter and wife.

As I sit here though, after having my water broken (which was extremely weird and a tad invasive-guess I'll have to get used to invasiveness) and an IV in my arm I am feeling much calmer. I guess once something you were worried about actually becomes your reality you simply adapt. My contractions are getting stronger but instead of becoming filled with fear about what's to come I am actually filled with peace. I give credit to my wonderful supportive husband sitting beside me, my family members and their endless encouragement, the prayers offered up by friends and family alike, and of course, the peace given to me from my Heavenly Father. No one can have this baby but me, and God has specially designed me to do it.

That's all for now. My next post will include pictures of our new daughter, Makaylee Grace Robinson.